There are so many differences in the world, but despite our continued evolution as a society, there are still many who are stuck in the past, and are narrow-minded when it comes to our different beliefs, skin colour, physical appearance, sexual orientation, values and beliefs. This causes unhealthy tension, increased conflict and leave certain individuals or groups feeling either superior or inferior to others. In life, we are often faced with making tough choices and decisions. Some of which, others may not agree with. This happens both at home and in the workplace, all for a variety of different reasons. I am going to share a personal choice I made which led to me being estranged from my family. Advertisements
In our busy lives, so many of us feel physically and psychologically drained. This is a result of both our personal or professional lives, and let’s be honest, the one directly impacts the other. Often we are so overwhelmed by having to give so much of ourselves that we have no time to just be. And then, if you are the self-critic, you never feel adequate or satisfied by what you give or do. The result is burn-out, anxiety, stress and depression. I will share a bit about what I believe causes this in the workplace, some of my experiences, and my advice. I hope you find it helpful.
I have a love-hate relationship with digital technology, the internet and social media platforms. It is both productive, in that it has made doing things easier and faster, but also destructive, in that it has made us humans less likely to think for ourselves and be less present in what is happening around us, including our interactions. I have categorized my thoughts and feelings under ‘The Good’, ‘The Bad’, and then ‘Adapt’, so that whilst we embrace the good, we become more mindful and in control of the bad.
If you haven’t yet, please read Part 1 of “Having Difficult Conversations”. Part 2 is about difficult conversations I have had in the workplace. Despite what people might think of you, have the courage to lead difficult conversations that demonstrates you taking ownership, and ultimately taking action to ensure you address the things that negatively impacts your team or organisational culture. When people say things you don’t understand or that you feel to be untrue, confront it.
Are you conflict averse? Do you avoid having difficult conversations? Nobody likes conflict, but there are times when it is needed and times when it is unavoidable. Having a difficult conversation can be uncomfortable and awkward. I believe the fundamentals for having difficult conversations are: Being able to listen by giving another your fullest attention. Listening to understand, and with empathy. Being able to negotiate, and compromise when need be. Be sure of the facts, and when you discover you are wrong, admit it, and apologise. Be assertive, and frank when you need to be. Act with integrity. Be authentic, and true to you. This is the first of a two-part blog series where I will be sharing some experiences I have had in family, parenting and especially the workplace. Part 1 is about difficult conversations related to family and parenting. Not all conflicts need addressing. There are times when it’s better to just let something go. Be honest with yourself about what you feel, and what you need to do to move on. If it relates to something within your control, and is something that is important to you, find the courage to have difficult conversations, and not be conflict averse.
A job and being a mother each comes with its own pressures and challenges. Our primary responsibility should be the growth and development of our children to ensure they are prepared for what awaits them in our big, diverse and complex world. Along with loving, feeding, clothing, providing a secure environment, there is teaching them about moral values. Nothing prepares us for motherhood, then add in working full time, and it often makes me want to cry with exhaustion. How is being an effective and good mom possible when you spend eight to ten hours a day at work? Personally, it has been incredibly hard. My state of being has more often than not been a combination of frustration, anger and guilt. This causes an immense amount of stress, and at times has led to depression.
Thanks for joining me! I will be putting up my first blog post on Thursday, 3 January 2019. I look forward to engaging with you, and hope that sharing my life experiences and learning will resonate with you. In the meantime, click on About, and find out who I am, and why I’m here. “You must be the change you wish to see in the world” — Mahatma Gandhi